The Last Blog

” Saying goodbye doesn’t mean anything. It’s the time we spent together that matters, not how we left it.”
~ Trey Parker

As we officially close the doors to 707 Strength & Fitness tonight, I still don’t quite believe it myself. I have been stewing over what to write on this very night for almost a month now, and I find myself…

…quiet.

I’ve written over 20 rough drafts.

I’ve spent hours upon hours in total re-reading, editing, deleting, and completely starting over. I’ve done every theme imaginable for the blog post – Super Sad, Trip Down Memory Lane, Overly Emotional, Super Thankful, Trying Too Hard To Be Funny, and so on.

I’ve even Googled how to write an exceptional goodbye letter! The shame…

The words just don’t quite blend together. It’s like trying to mix oil and water – No matter how hard I stir, and no matter the utensils and machines, it just ain’t happenin’.

How can I put into words what these seven years have meant to me, and even more so, what each of you have meant to me?!

Everything I have written just seems watered down.

Words seem to make my heart and soul tangible, when it’s no where near that.

Anything I say is not enough. Not nearly enough.

Typically, in moments like this, we simply raise the white flag and end it with a sincere, “Thank you.”

But, even that felt like a bee sting. You deserve more than a simple thank you.

Right now, the best comparison I can make to all this is being a parent. We never really appreciated our parents growing up. Most of us can relate to stories of how our parents nagged us, annoyed us, punished us, and made our lives miserable and embarrassing. It’s amazing our eyes didn’t get stuck from rolling them so much at our parents. “They just don’t get it!”

And then… We became parents.

Suddenly, it all made sense to us. Damn… they were right.  I get it, now.

And then, we became people that we needed to be for our kids. We became better, because we wanted better for our kids. We learned gratitude and living more in the moment through our kids’ eyes.

Where we once thought we were going to change the lives of our kids, we realized that they were actually changing us!

Where I once thought I was going to change the lives of others through CrossFit, I realized that they were actually changing me for the better!  I wanted to be better, because I wanted better for my clients.  I learned gratitude and living more in the moment through my clients’ eyes, and the stories they shared with me. The stories they trusted me with.

So many stories. So many memories. So many lessons.

Life is complicated, messy, beautiful, shitty, rewarding, unfair, and totally worth it all.

Rather than taking trips down memory lane and living in the past, I would like to focus on this moment right here, right now, as you are reading my last and final blog post for 707. (My eyes are watering up as I type these very words, and suddenly I feel a boa around my neck).

The overwhelming gratitude I have can never be expressed adequately to you in words. It just can’t. So, I’m not even going to try.

What I will try to do, though, is Facebook stalk all of you and keep in touch. 😉

I love you.

I love the woman I became with all of you.

And, I love that so many of you chose to move forward.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
~ Viktor Frankl